Recently I listened to a book written by Will Bowen: “Happy This Year!: The Secret to Getting Happy Once and for All”.  There are a number of thought-provoking stories and life experiences that help the reader consider what it takes to be happy.  It is not a panacea for making you happy, nor does it have a cure-all for our lives; but, it does help us consider what it takes to find that sacred path of a more Happy life.

Bottom line, Happiness is a choice and by learning more about what it means to be Happy (which can be different for each of us), we can then understand how to achieve a more fulfilling and Happy life.  Happiness comes in many shapes and forms as is put forth in this book, but there are two themes that I want to focus on.

The first is dealing with the people around us.  When considering what happiness is, it is easy for us to look at our surroundings and blame others for our own unhappiness.  We think to ourselves, ” If that person was not in my life, I could be more happy!”    I believed this statement to be more true than not until I read about the “Sacred Clowns (heyókȟa)” of the American Indians.  Principally, the heyókȟa functions both as a mirror and a teacher, using extreme behaviors to mirror others, thereby forcing them to examine their own doubts, fears, hatreds, and weaknesses.  The calling of being a heyókȟa (Sacred Clown) is considered to be equal to that of a medicine man, a man of honor. During ritualistic trials of an American Indian man, he would be put through a number or tortuous situations; and the way he dealt with the pain would show his readiness to be given new roles in the tribe.  A Sacred Clown’s job is to harass, ridicule and make a person feel weak and persuade him to fail.  My first thought, “And how is this suppose to help the struggling man?”  Then the truth behind this madness was revealed.  The presence of this sarcastic man ended up being a help to the suffering man, though at first it would not seem as such.  This Sacred Clown, with all his demeaning comments, would add more resolution to those suffering through the trial.  They would say to themselves, “I am going to show this Clown, that I can make it” and they would.  It was found that the percentage of successes was higher with the Clown’s presence, than without it.

So, what does this have to do with happiness.  We all have “Sacred Clowns” in our lives, those that continually try to bring us down, that tell us we will never make it and that what we do is never good enough.  They harass us to the point that we begin to lose faith in our own ability to succeed.  It is important for us to recognize our Sacred Clowns and realize how they are helping us find success in our lives.  As hard as the struggle may be, these Clowns are actually helping us find the inner strength we need to overcome.  How many times have we thought to ourselves, “I am going to show him/her, I am going to make this work!” and then we go and do it.  So here is the little gem of wisdom I learned from this story, our true success and happiness is dependent on us seeing that those “Sacred Clowns” with all their nay saying and pessimism,  are actually helping us become stronger and more determined.  By understanding this truth, we can now use our Clowns as a stepping stone, rather than thinking stones are being thrown at us.

The second thought is about what we say to ourselves.  The question has been asked,  “Who was the Greatest Boxer of all Time?”   Most people will respond, “Mohammad Ali”.   Why is that?  Well, he was the first to tell you he was the greatest.  In reality, there were a number of boxers that had more wins and more success in the boxing arena than him, but because he told us he was the greatest, that is what we remember.  He later made the comment, that for him to win a fight, he would try to psych out the other boxer and at the same time tell himself over and over he could do it.  So all the talk was mostly self talk to help him prepare for the fight.  It is amazing how self talk can make or break a person.  If you believe you can do it, the odds are that you will succeed.  But if you believe you can’t do it, you won’t.  To be Happy, we have to tell ourself we are happy and then prove it, which means we make it happen.  Then we continually tell ourself, “I Am Happy”.

The 3rd of the Ten Commandments, states:  “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.”  We have all heard this commandment before and try to live it; or do we?  When the Lord told Moses to go down into Egypt and free the Children of Israel from slavery, Moses had some concerns and here is one of the conversations:

“And Moses said unto God, Behold, when I come unto the children of Israel, and shall say unto them, The God of your fathers hath sent me unto you; and they shall say to me, What is his name? what shall I say unto them?”  (Exodus 3:13)

“And God said unto Moses, I AM THAT I AM: and he said, Thus shalt thou say unto the children of Israel, I AM hath sent me unto you.”  (Exodus 3:14)

I have always wondered about this response and what it means.  The name of the Lord is “I AM” and we are not to use the Name of the Lord in vain.  So, what does this mean?  From the book I understood this; when using the words “I AM”, we should always use them for good, not bad or in vain.  I AM good, I AM wise, I AM great would be using the name in the correct form.  I AM Bad, I AM an idiot, I AM stupid would be using the name in vain.  Now consider how we do our self talk; are we using the Lord’s name in vain or are we using the name in an endearing and loving way.  Before we can find the Happiness we seek, we have to first believe we deserve to be happy and the best place to start is to tell ourselves we are happy.

Finally, when it comes to Sacred Clowns, I recognize that they exist and will use them to motivate me, not bring me down.  At the same time, I will try not to be a Sacred Clown, but be an inspiration to anyone that is in need of improving their own self talk and struggle.  As, I have said, it is all about choice and I Choose to BE HAPPY.